Parenting: Desires in Conflict
“Parenting: Desires in Conflict”
Key thought: Whatever rules our heart will exercise inescapable influence over our life and behaviour.
3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
# 1: It is good for some Christians to remain unmarried – but do so for the Kingdom of God, not selfish reasons.
# 2: There is no biblical law that says a married couple must have children, though a couple’s desire not to have children is often linked to heart desires and fears which the gospel trumps.
Heart motivation questions to consider and discuss as a couple:
- Why don’t you want children? More money? More house? More career? Fear? (“I’d be a bad mom! I’m not an expert!”) Bad theology? (“We can serve God better without children.”) A lack of eternal perspective? (“My bucket list!”)
- Why do one of you – or both of you - not want one of the parents to raise the children themselves? More money? More house? More career? Fear? (I’d be a bad mom! I’m not an expert!) Bad theology? (“We can serve God better without children.”) A lack of eternal perspective? (“My bucket list!”)
- Talk about children while dating. Come to key life decisions (who is working, who is staying at home, what each thinks about day-care, etc.) before engagement.
- Live off one person’s income. Make plans (mortgage, etc.) based on one person’s income.
- High calling of parenthood. Eternity!!
- The gospel changes everything.